Donald Trump will resign so he can run for two more terms

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Dateline: 1/19/2019, 10:32 AM EST

CNN reports that an official says that Trump plans to make Democrats an offer to end shutdown, not declare national emergency.

In a Len Bakerloo exclusive, we have learned that he will:

  • Resign. By ending his term one day shy of two years he will be allowed to run for two more years.
  • Announce his candidacy for President in 2020 as an independent.
  • Be pardoned by the new Mike Pence of all crimes, past, present and future.

An official who wants to remain anonymous because he doesn’t want to be fired over Twitter says, “The President has no interest in being President. He is only interested in running for President. He wants to run as an independent because he knows that he will never fool the majority of the electorate he can count on 34% of the electorate to remain in a trance state for two more years.”

The official concluded by saying, “Of course, the President is known for going off script so what he actually does is anyone’s guess. But that’s the plan.”

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